Steps to Slowing Down Summer (and Beyond)

Does anyone else's year begin in August and end in May? Just me?

As I was reflecting at the end of 2022 about what I wanted my new year to look like, I made a decision to not be as busy. It had (and has) become apparent that every time I talk with someone, we both always say how busy it has been. The words tumbling out of my own lips were alarming; they were always the same, and always about 'busy.' I have started trying to find other ways of conveying how I'm doing - and it all started with some of the decisions I made right before the new year.

• Enjoy a slower pace.
• Move away from using social media as a primary communication platform.
• Use what time I have for my business wisely, and not regretting it when it is time to step away to be with my family.
• Return home to a more traditional role within our family and household instead of spending so much time working.

If anything, 2023 has been a challenge because there are so many things tempting me to fill up my calendar MORE. I've had As we come to the close of summer, I've spent time reflecting on the steps I'm taking to intentionally stay in a slow(er) lane of life.

Here is my short list of hacks to keep your schedule more open so you can slow down to enjoy the sweetness of life:

Step 1: Make an agreement with yourself about what you will - and what you won't - accomplish during a set period of time. Maybe this is per month, or over a couple months. Keeping any large goals you have for yourself in mind, limit your agreement to 90 days (three months).

In my case, I had three things (with a fourth in reserve) that I wanted to accomplish during June, July, and August: Complete a Barre Fitness certification, get my new garden into shape (there were a lot of weeds), and get this website and blog up and running. I am happy to say that I completed all these tasks, even if this website is still in its infancy. (I cannot wait for The Joyous Beauty to blossom!)

Step 2: I blocked off time in my schedule to complete these things. It might have been an hour a day, it may have been several a couple times per week, but I made sure it was down because it helps me remember what I am supposed to do when, and gives me a clear reason to use when I need to say no to someone or something.

I didn't always succeed in hitting every marked calendar block. Sometimes life interrupted or my kids really needed me - or I simply needed a break. That's okay! With the way our annual calendar is set up (socially and job-wise), summer is one of those opportunities to be a little more flexible. I kept at it anyway with my eye on the goals I'd set out for myself, biting them off one chunk at a time.

Step 3: I communicated what I needed to do to, and what I needed from, my family. This is crucial to success. If we don't be honest in our communications, our family doesn't understand why we get upset when we are not given the time we need to accomplish our goals.

I even let my kids know when it was time for me to study or focus on a specific task, including how long I needed to work in order to get finished so I could spend time with them. It wasn't perfect but it went a lot better than previous summers when I'd sit down and get frustrated because I had not communicated clearly about my intentions - and what I'd be doing afterward as a mother and wife.

Step 4: I said 'no' a lot, to a lot of things, and without any guilt. This is the one we hear about a lot in self-help advice, but I think the steps above set us up for better results and greater success because we have reasons behind our responses.

Sometimes, my kids would ask me why we weren't doing an activity. I always responded honestly about our schedule and why we needed downtime. For children, in particular, they spend so much time in structured school days and activities that they NEED play and unstructured time for imagination. For parents, it's really nice not to run around from one activity to another, even if it does look good on some resume later on.

Trust me, my friend, say 'no' a little more often and give yourself the headspace you need. Your sanity, your schedule, and your relationships most of all will thank you later!

Step 5: Lastly, I did what I said I was going to do, both with my goals and as a member of my family. It is very tempting to fall into a habit of continuing on to 'one more thing' or 'finishing up' whatever we're on. I've been there and done that, and I'm happy to report that I've broken that bad habit. As a result, my relationships are better and I feel a lot less stressed.

Part of what's enabled me to step away from working and the hustle culture is that I've set myself time limits. Time blocking is extremely valuable, but you have to be intentional with the time constraints in which you're working, so I set myself a list of 1-3 things to do in that time. Then I do them. Anything extra that I squeeze in is gravy.

By no means am I perfect at this (yet). I still found weeks where I overcommitted myself. But, I made it a priority to keep my summer weeks open as much as possible and gave myself permission to enjoy an increased load of reading what I wanted, sleeping until I wanted to get up (most days), spending time in the sunshine (as much as I could stand), and sometimes doing spontaneous things with the kids. (If you don't yet know, I'm not overly spontaneous, but it was fun to surprise them with occasional visits with friends and trips to the nearby park.)

As I continue exploring what intentional living and slowing down looks like for me, I'll come back and share more. We are headed into what's coined as the busiest time of the year, for me included. I think that it's important to recognize that our year's cycle has ebbs and flows. Summer is an ebb. Maybe Fall is a flow.

Share with me: What is one way you slowed down a little this summer?